Empowering thought through authentic voice
Growing up my life was a tapestry of music, holidays, and traditions. My circle of friends came from various backgrounds. I was fortunate enough to experience and appreciate all our differences and always remained curious about their families.
Entering high school, it became apparent that not everyone appreciated our differences. There were friendships that dictated, who I should hang out with, what kind of music to listen to, and how I should dress.
Exclusion versus inclusion is an emotional roller-coaster. The journey has helped shape me into the person I am today, and I hope my story will encourage you to continue to be curious and inclusive.
Ever since I was thirteen, working in the travel industry was always a dream of mine. In my early twenties I landed my first travel job and was over the moon. It was an exciting time, like a sponge, taking it all in. Ready to take on the world and hopefully see it too!
Inclusion
Everything was great, the thought of being an outsider, who did not look like the others in the office, never even crossed my mind. I was simply Michele, a bright, talented young woman they hired, and the right candidate for the position.
Two years under my belt, it was time to branch out in search of a larger company with more growth opportunities.
My search didn’t take long. The travel management company was more than triple the size in office space and in employees. My fellow teammates had similar backgrounds, who welcomed me, and were eager to share their knowledge. It was clear I made the right decision. Life was good.
Exclusion
About a week into the job, a woman named Barbara who worked in another department, invited me to join her in the cafeteria for lunch along with a larger group of fellow employees. It felt like I sat there for an eternity before anyone noticed. Like a fly on the wall, it was strange to listen and not be engaged in conversation. No one spoke to me, not even Barbara. These were people I recognized and even knew their names. This was odd in contrast to my initial impression of belonging.
Lunch time was about over, the conversation was winding down. Still no acknowledgement, I actually thought they knew who I was but were so engaged in their conversation, it wasn’t even a thought there was someone new at the table. Donna, an office manager, brazenly halted the entire group’s conversation to turn their full attention to the new person at the table. I introduced myself as a new team member who started about a week ago and was invited by Barbara. How did she not notice me? I did not feel invisible and yet the entire group at the table except for Barbara did not know anything about me. The company took up the entire floor with executive and managers’ offices all around the exterior. Everyone else were in pods in the center of the floor. So how did they miss a new person on the floor?
Belonging
Onboarding was not as formal as they are or should be today.
Returning back to the office from lunch, Donna still clearly bothered by the interaction and embarrassed began to put changes in motion. At lunch she declared that improvements had to be made with their on-boarding process.
Moving forward, New employees were introduced to all departments. New employees including myself were introduced to everyone on the floor.
Was it my arrival and Donna’s intervention that made the change? I would like to think so.
New Chapter
Exclusion:
Two years on the job, my dedication and hard work paid off and was promoted to team lead. One of my goals was to continue to improve the onboarding process.
Changes in the industry and in our offices were rapidly taking place. Real-estate became a focus and it was time to consolidate our offices.
The new seating plan was kept confidential. As moving day approached, more questions were raised. Mary, our phone technician, and I had built a bond. It was important to have this bond in order to keep things working smoothly and make things happen. She became my source, my ally.
Mary pulled me aside quietly to let me know that she had not been given a plan for my desk and phone. Three pods, four managers, do the math. She confirmed my name and phone line were not listed in the new plans. “Mary, there must be some kind of mistake. Check again.” but she assured me her plans were accurate based on the information she was given.
Announcing lunch breaks, bio breaks, and days off became a thing. Sharing a desk is what it came down to. Temporarily.
There was never a thought that I did not belong and or that I was being let go. No earlier signs of exclusion existed. Was I ignorant to feel this way? Did I miss any earlier signs?
What’s happening?
Exclusion
For years my focus was to work hard, proving my worth every day, continuing to believe that we were a community and team where racism and biases were not front and center.
When I was promoted to Vice President, it was an acknowledgment of all my hard work and dedication.
Two years after I began my new role, there was a change in leadership along with a noticeable change in the culture of the office. People began to talk more openly about the truth of their experiences. I noticed a big shift happening, not only in my work but also throughout the country.
Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) became a focus. It was time to move on as I found myself with new thoughts and feelings.
Ageism & Gender
Experiencing more biases from others put me a bit on-guard. What I have learned is this: I am perfectly fine, just the way I am, a seasoned woman who embraces others for who they are. My hope is that we can continue to learn to be accepting of others.
World Events Creates Change
After a long-standing career in the travel industry, the pandemic hit all of us particularly the travel industry. Decisions were made about my career that were outside of my control, or were they?
Somehow, I lost my voice to speak up for myself. Shock, disappointed, angry, and a whole slew of other emotions rushed through me.
It was an internal struggle and a battle that cause me to pause, and self-reflect. December 2020, I started planning what was next for me.
January 2021, I repacked my gifts of tools, skills, knowledge, and beliefs and started my own consulting company.
Grateful for all my experience, including the bruises I endured while sitting inside Corporate America. It was a gift, and an opportunity that gave me the foundation to do what I am doing today.
The focus for me is to be an ally and to support individuals and organizations who are truly vested in making real change beyond checking off a box.
There is a line from the show Queen Sugar, created by Ava DuVernay.
I know it’s a little thing, but it’s my little thing. Almost 60 years old and I will not be sidelined, sidetracked or side stepped, or put in a damned corner and told to wait my turn. Not another day. It’s my time. It’s my time.
Like Violet from Queen Sugar, I have experienced the roller coaster of emotions, the impact from others with their words or their actions. It is time to take a stand and help make a difference.
Are you in an environment lacking DEI? Imagine yourself surrounded by people who see you, accept you, and embrace you for who you are. Think of the possibilities and opportunities a supportive environment could open for your future. And if you need help making real change, I would love to come alongside you.